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Richmond Divorce and Family Law Blog

Are you ready for a divorce?

Marriage is one of the strongest symbols of human optimism in Kentucky. Despite increasing divorce rates, many people continue to walk down the aisle, hoping for a lifelong commitment. Such a commitment is indeed possible, but it takes two to tango and sometimes your partner may be dancing to a much different tune.

That said, you may now be wondering if divorce is the right course of action. According to The New York Times, couples should approach divorce with the same careful thinking that led them down the aisle. So, with this in mind, here are a few questions you should ask yourself before filing for divorce.

Where military divorce intersects with civil divorce

Most United States citizens have a template of divorce ingrained in their minds from books, film and other media portrayals. Divorce is a growing part of the U.S. landscape. Sadly, too many children receive their understanding of the divorce process from their own divided-family experience.

Military members were once civilians. They may retain the U.S. cultural picture of how divorce works in America. After entering the military, former civilians may not have reason to learn that military divorce and civilian divorce intersect—until they wish to separate from a spouse.

Maintain control over your child's post-divorce life

While custody laws in Kentucky protect the best interests of the child by design, when these matters go to trial, they wind up in the hands of a judge to whom your child is a stranger. At The Grinnell Firm, we believe that it is better and healthier for parents and children alike if you and your spouse can reach an agreement regarding custody and/or visitation matters outside of court. That way, you as parents maintain control over the decisions that will affect your child's life after the divorce, and your family can avoid the stress of going to court. 

Custody and visitation are often contested issues in a divorce, and it is easy to see why. As parents, you and your spouse each want to maintain as much time together with your child as possible, and while you certainly each want what is best for your child, you may have fundamental disagreements over what is in your child's best interests. There are now a number of alternative dispute resolution methods, including the collaborative process, that may allow you to reach an agreement without taking the matter to court. 

Grounds for divorce in Kentucky

There may be any number of reasons why couples in Richmond choose to divorce. Yet as the laws regulating divorce have changed over the years, so too has the perception of the reasons why people separate. Most have likely heard the term "no-fault divorce" yet not have a strong understanding of what it means. A review of the shifting philosophy of what constitutes grounds for divorce in Kentucky may help to better define it. 

Section 403.050 of Kentucky's Domestic Relations Code details the state's "divorce from bed and board" law. The years past, one had to prove that their spouse was at fault for ending their relationship before a divorce could be granted. If such proof could not be found, one could then be granted a divorce from bed and board (which equates to a legal separation). Although this law remains on the books, it is no longer cited. 

What is a military protective order?

Victims of domestic violence often feel as though they are powerless to stop their abusers. If you have been the victim of such abuse at the hands of a spouse who is also a member of the military, those feelings may be even more prevalent. The very nature of your spouse's work may make them an even greater danger to you, as they may have combat training or easy access to weapons. Plus, you may not know to whom you can report such abuse, as questions of jurisdiction often come up between military personnel and standard law enforcement authorities. Yet there are resources that the military does offer to protect you from an abusive servicemember spouse

One is a military protection order. According to the Cornell Law School, such an order is issued by your spouse's commanding officers and mandates that they refrain from contact with you for a certain period of time. An MPO can also require your spouse to surrender any weapons they have (as well as their weapons custody card). As soon as an MPO has been issued to your spouse, one must also be provided to you and the installation law enforcement offices where your spouse is stationed within 24 hours. 

How can I co-parent with a difficult ex?

For divorced couples in Kentucky, co-parenting is rarely easy. This is especially true when dealing with a difficult ex-spouse, who may create conflict simply because. It’s crucial that you come to an understanding to benefit your children, even if it seems like an impossible task. In this case, offers the following advice.

Be flexible

How to split expensive art in a divorce

There are some works of art in Kentucky that have more worth than the houses they are in. It is no wonder why so many couples argue over paintings and other works that can hold significant value. In some cases, fighting over a painting can be equally as contentious as fighting over child custody. 

Before going forth with divorce proceedings, a couple should document every single asset they own. This includes every work of art. In addition to the piece, the couple should also acquire any documentation that could help a judge decide who gets the painting once the marriage is formally over. 

How can I deal with my divorce?

While divorce is rarely easy, for members of the military it can be much harder. There are many factors that simply aren’t present during a civilian divorce, and military divorces can make you feel as though you’re going through it completely alone. In this case, Task and Purpose offer the following tips so you can navigate the process with the least amount of stress as possible.

Bring together documents now

Handling stress over a family law issue

When two people decide that their marriage needs to come to an end, or one spouse has simply had enough and is determined to move on, many different challenges may lie ahead. These potential problems should not get in the way of a divorce when such a move is necessary, but it is smart to prepare nonetheless. Child support, property distribution and custody are just a few of the family law matters that some couples have to work through. Looking beyond the financial impact of divorce and post-divorce issues, other challenges can arise, such as high stress levels.

It is pivotal to manage your stress during this time, especially if something as important as the custody of your child is at stake. Sometimes stress is inevitable, but there may be ways you can give yourself reassurance and confidence, which may not only help you sleep better each night but present your case well in court. For example, you may find that participating in a physical activity helps you get rid of stress and find some mental relief from family law matters that are causing anxiety.

When should you modify your child custody agreement?

When you and your spouse are getting divorced in Kentucky, you will need to negotiate a child custody agreement that discusses where your children will reside, how critical parenting decisions will be made and how visitation schedules will work. Creating an agreement that benefits you, your soon-to-be ex and your children are imperative to maintaining positive relationships. Over time, you may discover the need to modify the agreement that you initially made to keep it accurate and valid. 

Understanding under what conditions a modification may be requested can help you to manage your agreement effectively. According to, some of the reasons why you may ask for changes to be made and your agreement to be updated include the following:

  • Your former spouse passes away and is no longer around to participate in parenting your children. 
  • You have evidence that your child's life is endangered due to domestic violence, substance abuse or unstable living conditions. 
  • Your former spouse is neglecting to abide by the terms and conditions that were previously laid out in your initial agreement. 
  • Either you or your ex has relocated and it is no longer feasible to retain the previously agreed-upon visitation schedule. 

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