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Accepting a co-parent’s new partner

Choosing to divorce a spouse is one of the biggest decisions anyone can make. If you have children with your partner, though, the decision may be even more difficult for you. Still, working toward a successful post-divorce future is probably best for everyone involved. 

Remarriage is common after a divorce. In fact, according to a recent study, more than half of divorced Americans over the age of 35 eventually remarry. If you share children with an ex-spouse who remarries, you must develop a strategy for accepting your former spouse’s new partner. 

Think positively 

While you cannot think yourself out of every situation, you may be able to increase your chances of a successful outcome by thinking positively. By considering your ex-spouse’s new partner an asset to your children’s overall wellbeing, you keep yourself in a productive frame of mind. As such, rather than looking for problems, try to expect the best. 

Respect your former spouse 

You and your former spouse likely do not agree about everything. Still, you must respect your former’s spouse’s right to co-parent your children. Deferring to his or her judgment about a new partner is important. Remember, if you decide to remarry, you likely want your ex-spouse to extend you the same courtesy. 

Listen to your kids 

In a post-divorce family, your children must be a top priority. Even though giving your spouse and his or her new partner the benefit of the doubt is often a recipe for success, new partners are not always good for your children. If your kids have valid concerns, address them. 

While adjusting to your former spouse’s new partner may seem challenging, it is probably not impossible. By focusing on your children and working to accept your ex-spouse’s new relationship, you can likely help your kids grow into healthy and productive adults.

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